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Like…I don’t advocate punching children
But when the Heaven is for Real trailer comes on and the kid goes “it’s boooootiful” I
I don’t know like that video was hilarious because of the editing and blah blah but like it was also genuinely hilarious to me because my childhood best friend actually DID that shit to me. Like she lived next door right, and she would want to go on a walk or something. I remember one specific time…we were maybe 10ish? I don’t know. My mom would never allow me. My mom is the mom who engrained in us that suspicious vans are so evil that one time my sister actually cried once when she saw one…but anyway I digress. So I told her no I’m not allowed, and the bitch goes off with her sister and whoever else I forgot, walking down the street yelling “you can’t go because you’re a baby hahaha” or something really dumb like that. Like dumb shit kids say. I knew right then and there that she was Satan.
If I were a celebrity I would totally do promotional commercials for Nauzene that product saved my life.
— Alan Dean Foster (via maxkirin)